by Jennifer Moore (aka Jaye Seymour) –
The problem with wishes is they sometimes come true. One minute Rosa was sitting at the kitchen table, blowing out the candles on her birthday cake and wishing she was really a princess, and the next thing she knew the cake, the kitchen table – the whole house in fact – had completely disappeared. She found herself in a huge stone hall, decorated with gloomy-looking tapestries and stuffed animal heads glaring down at her from the dreary grey walls. The kitchen chair had vanished along with everything else, and Rosa was now perched on a rather hard silver throne decorated with glittering rubies. It felt cold and uncomfortable, and the spiky red jewels dug into her bottom and the backs of her legs.
“Ow,” she muttered, wriggling from side to side to try and get comfy.
“STOP!” shouted a loud bossy voice. It was coming from behind a red velvet curtain strung across a nearby doorway. “I’m watching you,” boomed the voice. “Stop that fidgeting at ONCE and sit up straight. Proper princesses DO NOT SLOUCH!”
Rosa quickly did as she was told.
A white gloved hand covered in gigantic diamond rings appeared around the edge of the curtain. It was followed by an angry looking face with a pig-like nose, flushed red cheeks, and eyes like squished green gumdrops. They glared out at Rosa from underneath two enormous eyebrows and a heavy gold crown.
“Sorry,” Rosa whispered. “I think there’s been a bit of a muddle-up. I’m not even a pretend princess, let alone a proper one.”
“Nonsense,” boomed the scary-looking lady in the crown. She stepped out from behind the curtain to reveal a gruesome gold-sequined dress that made her look like a puffed-up goldfish. “Did you, or did you not, blow out the candles on your birthday cake and make a wish?”
“Ye-es,” admitted Rosa. “I suppose I did.”
“And did you, or did you not, wish to be a princess?”
“Ye-es,” said Rosa. “But I didn’t really think it would come true.”
“NOT COME TRUE? What use is wishing if it doesn’t come true? No, I’m sorry. You wished to be a princess and now you are one. It’s as simple as that. So we’d better get on with it, hadn’t we?”
“Get on with what?” asked Rosa, who was trying hard not to cry.
“With your princess training of course. Now, first things first. My name is Queen Hilary the Horrendous. You may address me as ‘Your Majesty’ or ‘Most Gracious Highness.’ I also answer to ‘Your Wonderful Royalness’ or just plain ‘Sir.’ I will be in charge of your teaching program. There are a few ground rules you need to remember while you’re here:
- Number One: I am to be obeyed in all matters.
- Number Two: No talking to the magic mirror in the Throne Room. Everyone knows I’m the fairest of them all anyway so there’s really no point.
- Number Three: No talking to the dragon in the castle dungeon.
- Number Four: No dangling your hair out of high towers for handsome princes to climb up. It just makes it knotty, and if there’s one thing I can’t abide in a princess, it’s knotty hair.
- Number Five: Frog-kissing is forbidden at all times.
- And Number Six: Most important of all – SIT UP STRAIGHT! I won’t have bottom-wriggling, seat-slouching princesses in MY castle. It simply won’t do. Do I make myself clear?”
“Y-yes, Your Gracious W-wonderfulness,” stammered Rosa. “I mean your High Horrendousness…I mean, sir.”
“Good,” boomed Queen Hilary, taking a thin, learner-crown out of her handbag and placing it on Rosa’s head. “Lessons begin in twenty minutes in the old banqueting hall. Don’t be late. Any questions?”
“Well…just one,” said Rosa, sounding a lot braver than she felt. “When can I go home?”
“This is your home,” replied the Queen. “At least until your training is complete. Then we’ll probably marry you off to a suitable prince or send you to sleep for a hundred years. If you’re really lucky we might pack you off into the forest to live with some dwarfs.”
“I see,” said Rosa, sadly. “Can I at least get something to eat before we start? I’ve been looking forward to my birthday cake all afternoon and now I can’t eat it and I’m really hungry and…” Just thinking about her poor uneaten cake still sitting there on the kitchen table, looking pink and delicious, was too much for her, and she burst into tears.
“Oh, very well,” sighed the Queen, handing her a silver silk handkerchief to dry her eyes. “If you run down to the castle kitchens there might be some leftovers from lunch. Just make sure you chew with your mouth shut and no burping afterwards or there’ll be trouble. Princesses NEVER burp.” And with that she strode off, muttering something under her breath about wasted wishes and poor posture.
Rosa followed her to the winding staircase at the other side of the room, realizing she had no idea where to find the kitchens or the old banqueting hall. But Queen Hilary had already disappeared out of sight, and Rosa wasn’t sure she’d have dared to ask anyway.
Instead she made her way down to the next floor, peeking into the first room she came to. It was completely empty save for an old-fashioned spinning wheel in the middle of the room. There was a sign hanging from the pointy end which read, ‘Warning, may contain sharp spindle”, but there were no clues as to where she might find some royal sandwiches.
On the next floor down she found a library full of books on everything from ‘Royal Rhymes and Riddles’ to ‘Twelve Dancing Princesses – Confessions of a Castle Cobbler’, but nothing to point her in the direction of a leftover sausage roll.
With time running out she followed the staircase all the way down to the bottom where she found… no, not the kitchen filled with delicious things to eat, but a great green dragon with huge yellow eyes and smoke streaming from both nostrils.
Rosa had never met a dragon before and was understandably nervous. But she remembered her manners and wished it a polite, “Good Afternoon.” And then she remembered the Queen’s rule about not talking to dragons in castle dungeons, but it was already too late for that.
“I…I…I’m sorry to d-d-disturb you,” she stammered. “I was trying to find something to eat.”
“Well don’t look at me,” grumbled the dragon. “I’m very bitter-tasting and probably rather chewy.” He rolled his eyes and sighed. “You’d probably get indigestion if you tried, and you know how much her horrible highness dislikes burping princesses.”
“She’s not very keen on wriggling or slouching ones either,” pointed out Rosa.
The dragon sighed again. “She’s a ghastly piece of work all round,” he said. “She’s had me chained down here for the last ten years without so much as a dry crust of bread. I’m so hungry I could eat a…”
“A horse?” asked Rosa hopefully, taking a quiet step back toward the staircase.
“No, I don’t like horses,” said the dragon. “Their hooves get stuck in my teeth.”
“A cow maybe?”
“No,” snorted the dragon. “Horrible noisy creatures. All moo and no music.”
“A house? I bet you’re so hungry you could eat a house,” Rosa suggested with another step backwards.
“No, not a house. Too dry and dusty. No, what I really fancy,” said the dragon, “is a pr…” Rosa knew what was coming next. “A nice juicy pr…” began the dragon, with a hungry-looking smile. “A deliciously succulent pink little pr…”
“Please don’t eat me,” begged Rosa, who was almost back at the stairs now. “If you let me go I promise I’ll bring you some food from the kitchens.”
“Eat you?” roared the dragon. “Why would I want to eat you? No, for the last ten years I’ve been dreaming about fat juicy prawns. Mmmmm yes. Prawns, prawns, prawns. Prawn cocktail, prawn salad, sweet and sour king prawns. Deeeeelicious. But sometimes I wonder if I’ll ever see another prawn again.” And with that it began to cry, great big gloopy dragon tears. Rosa crept closer and dabbed at his cheeks with the silver silk handkerchief.
“I wish I could free you,” she said kindly, “then you could fly away and eat all the prawns you wanted.”
“Thank you,” gasped the dragon, suddenly getting to his feet and shaking out his huge green-gold wings. Rosa jumped back in alarm. “Oh you dear, dear girl,” said the creature. “A million thank yous.”
“What did I do?” she asked.
“Why, you wished on a dragon’s tear, of course,” he explained. “And now I’m free.” With that he turned to the dungeon wall and let out a huge torrent of flame, knocking Rosa clean off her feet with his tail. But when the smoke finally cleared she could see a big round hole burnt right through the stonework.
“Can I give you a lift?” asked the dragon. “I’ll treat you to a slap-up prawn feast at the first seafood restaurant we come to.”
“I’d rather just go home, if that’s okay?” asked Rosa. “Back to my mum and dad and my birthday cake. I really don’t want to be a princess after all. It was a silly wish.”
“Well, I’m afraid you can’t unwish a wish,” the dragon explained. “But I think I might have an idea. Come on, hop on board.”
Rosa scrambled carefully up onto the dragon’s back and looped her arms around his neck. His scaly skin felt surprisingly smooth and warm against her arms.
“Ready?” asked the dragon and, without even waiting for an answer, he launched himself out through the hole and into the big wide world with a low whoop of delight.
Rosa clung on tight as they soared up into the clouds, leaving the castle and its bossy queen far behind. On and on they flew, across fields and houses; across towns and cities; across mountains and valleys; across rivers and oceans, finally coming to land in a busy supermarket car park. At least it was busy when they landed. It emptied pretty quickly once the other customers noticed the fire-breathing monster in their midst.
“Right,” commanded the dragon. “I’ll wait here by the shopping carts while you run in and buy a nice birthday cake.”
“I’m not sure I understand,” said Rosa.
“You will,” promised the dragon with a wink. “Oh, and you’d better get some candles too.”
Rosa chose a chocolate, star-shaped cake, covered in colored candy drops and took it to the cashier, along with two packets of candles and a giant pot of prawns, just for good measure.
“Are you paying by cash or card?” said the cashier, without even looking up.
“Erm…Do you accept crowns?” Rosa asked, handing her the heavy gold band from her head. “I’m afraid that’s all I’ve got.” And before the cashier could say anything, she hurried back out into the parking lot to find the dragon.
“Okay,” he smiled. “You put in the candles and I’ll light them. Seven should be enough for now.”
“But you said wishes couldn’t be unwished,” puzzled Rosa, putting in the last candle and stepping back away from the dragon’s gently flaming breath.
“That’s right,” he agreed. “But this is my cake and my wish.” With that he shut his big yellow eyes and blew.
One minute Rosa was there in the parking lot, and the next minute she was back at the kitchen table with her mum and dad and her beautiful pink birthday cake.
“Don’t forget to make a wish,” said her mum, lighting the last candle.
Rosa smiled, remembering the dragon’s kindness. She knew exactly what he must have wished for. “Maybe not this year,” she told her parents. “I’m happy just as I am.”
the end
Question Time:
1. Where did Rosa find herself after she made her wish?
2. What were some of the queen’s rules for princesses?
3. How did Rosa free the dragon?
4. What did the dragon wish for?
